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I NEED YOUR HELP!

Well everyone, I need a little bit of your assistance.

For my math class, we were told to design and administer a survey in order to collect data on something we have interest in. As an eating disorder sufferer for most of my life, I decided to create a survey that allowed me to gain further insight into the potential triggers of anorexia and bulimia.

I ended up designing a survey that looks to see if there is any correlation between GERD (also known as “acid reflux”) and the two main eating disorders – anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa. Currently I am in need of more data.  With that being said, if you have been diagnosed with GERD/Acid Reflux, Anorexia, OR Bulimia, please click on the link to my survey and take it. It will literally take you two minutes or even less to complete.  Also, after you take the survey, be sure to share the link with others who have GERD/Acid Reflux, Anorexia, and Bulimia.  The more people who take the survey, the more accurate my findings will be :)

Here’s the link: http://goo.gl/forms/GoUyIlqxyP

My Recent Trip to the Shrink – A Living Hell

My most recent psychiatrist visit was definitely not a piece of cake.

It’s Eating Disorder Awareness Week!

It’s Eating Disorder Awareness Week!

Well everyone, the time is here! It’s finally Eating Disorder Awareness Week and to start the week off, I made a the Q&A video I promised all of you in my last video.  Hopefully you enjoy it and make sure to write some suggestions in the comment box below for new videos that you want to see or new blog post topics you want to read!

Have a great day everyone!

Fleeing Fashion’s Cult: How One Young Woman Has Learned to Love Her Body

For too long, women everywhere have adhered to the teachings of fashion’s holiest texts, such as Vogue and Elle,hoping to gain self-confidence and empowerment by wearing the clothing they see on their cadaverous prophets.  The women who have become victims of this psychologically-destructive cult have lost the ability to express themselves. No longer do they seek attire that complements their figure or matches their unique personality. Why? Because all these victims want is to be what Vogue and Elle tells them to be!

But Holly Foster, an incredibly wise 22 year old, has refused to lose herself in fashion’s toxic teachings. When she was just 16, the age when most girls spend hundreds of dollars on the latest trends, Holly discovered a vintage dress at a charity shop and fell in love with it.  Today if you were to check out Holly’s closet, you would find it chalked full of the classiest pieces of vintage attire.  Knee-length skirts, stunning blouses, classic dresses . . . YOU NAME IT. If it is from the 40’s, you’ll probably find it in there!

We have a lot to learn from Holly Foster. She decided to wear clothes that not only suited her personality and figure, but also honored her moral values such as modesty. So my friends, before you purchase that overpriced tee from Abercrombie & Fitch or spend your whole paycheck at Hollister,  ask yourself why you are buying their clothes. Are you purchasing them because they reflect your values and personal style or do you just want to blend in with the other dedicated members of the fashion cult?

What Anorexia Really Is

What Anorexia Really Is

what anorexia really is

I made this picture because I really do think eating disorders are illnesses that are misunderstood by the majority of the population. Too many people think ED sufferers engage in behaviors by choice in order to achieve our nation’s current “thin ideal”. FYI folks, eating disorders are . . .

1) NOT the result of vanity.

2) NOT an illness that someone chooses to have.

3) NOT something that should be made fun of or not taken seriously. Would you make a joke about a person who is dying from cancer, a genetic condition, or another life-threatening physical condition? Then why is it even remotely humorous to judge or to make fun of someone who is dying from an eating disorder?

Eating Disorder Vlog: Relapse

The month of January is usually a month of great excitement. It is the beginning of a new year, of a new start on life. Unfortunately, that was not the case for me.
The month of January was like a heartless militant. It waged war on me and through the use of anxiety-provoking, stress-inducing events, it destroyed me in every battle. Now January is over and it won the war, shattering my emotional well-being and destroying any progress I made in overthrowing the kingdom of my eating disorder.
I hate to admit this but I have relapsed. My eating disorder is beginning to control everything about me and my life and this time, I don’t know how to stop it.

Final Hell

As I stood in my high school’s vestibule Thursday afternoon, with its high windows stretching from its floor to its pyramid-like ceiling, I could hear the obnoxious roar of students chatting behind me as they raced to their 6th period exam. I knew that at this time, I should be walking amongst that crowd of juveniles, but my body was crying in pain and the peach-colored skin of my face had been replaced by skin that had the sickly color of a gray rain cloud. I was now the newest victim of my suburban town’s influenza epidemic, and to be honest, I couldn’t be anymore grateful.

After a good 20 minutes of being trapped in the vestibule, my dad finally picked me up and took me home. There, I immediately crashed on my unmade bed. My body was ravaged with exhaustion as the flu virus continued to infiltrate every cell that composed me.  But not only was my body feeling totally devoid of energy, so was my brain.  Why? Well I had spent most of my free hours this past week with my head stuffed in textbooks because it was finals week – the dreaded week where teachers give out horrendously difficult exams (aka “finals”) in order to see if you are capable of regurgitating the knowledge that had been stuffed down your throat over the course of the semester.

Though I have a track record of acing my science and French exams, I have always struggled with math.  I do not know if that is because math has always been my first exam of the week or if it is because I am a complete dufus when it comes to trig functions and radians. Whatever the reason, I always do poorly on the exam.

And despite the hours of studying and watching Khan Academy videos, this year was no different . . . except for one thing. You see, I am usually able to pull off a C for my math final, but this year I decided to switch it up a little and get a F**KING F!

Yep, you read that right! I completely failed my math exam . . . .COMPLETELY.

I blame this horrific grade on the panic attack I suffered during the WHOLE exam period. From the minute the exam started to the minute the bell rang for us to close our exam packets, my heart bounded like a bass drum beneath my chest and my hands shook uncontrollably. I felt like I was a prisoner to the anxiety – trapped inside my body as the anxiety took control over every aspect of my mind.
But panic attack or not, my grade for the exam is still a F.  In my eyes this grade not only grades my exam, it also grades me as a person. My heart is an F. My dreams are an F. Oh and that soul of mine, that’s an F too.

Why can’t I just be like one of the smart kids for once? Why?

Just why?

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