The Waiting Game

pain

Since my MRI on Thursday, whenever the phones rings I can feel my heart pound and anxiety flood throughout my body. Every ounce of me is praying that the person dialing my family’s number possesses the precious results of my MRI and will tell us how we can treat the condition that has left even my doctor baffled. To my dismay, that call hasn’t come in yet and I hoping that today, Monday, will be the day I can finally get some answers.

My medical mystery all began in the beginning of August .  I was enjoying a peaceful vacation at my grandparent’s farm when I woke up from a deep slumber and to discover an odd pain in my left shoulder. I ignored it and I decided the origin of the pain was laying on my shoulder funny while I was asleep.  But as days passed by, I found the pain refused to subside. After weeks of agony, my parents decided it was time for me to visit my doctor. Concerned with my condition, she prescribed I attend grueling sessions of medical torture – physical therapy. For nearly 2 months, I have been attending the harrowing PT sessions twice weekly and you know, for awhile I started to think my arm was getting better. But that’s when the end of September struck and the pain intensified to an incredible level, spreading throughout my whole body.

My parents immediately scheduled another appointment with my doctor and when I went to see her, I could tell by the look on her face she was concerned. I was in so much pain, talking seemed like a chore. She ordered that I have an injection in order to relieve some of my suffering as well as go through an MRI.

Which leaves us back to where I’m at now, playing a anxiety-provoking waiting game till the MRI results come in.  I can’t help but hope that the radiologists discover something abnormal in the results. It is not that I long to be plagued with some physical malady, it is just that I want some answers. All I want to know is why the pain is there and what options I have to relieve it.  If the radiologists find nothing, I have no idea what I’ll do. I just be back to square one and I worry my parents will begin to believe that this pain I am experiencing is nothing but I story I fabricated in order to receive attention.

I just cannot describe in words how frustrated I am. If any of you are experiencing a similar situation, I am praying for you.  I know how much you are struggling right now, just please remember not to give up searching for answers for your condition. You know your body more than even the most accomplished specialist  and if you are experiencing pain, you need to get in checked out. Pain is the body’s way of saying that something is functioning properly. So don’t just dismiss it, because no one (including you) deserves to live in this agony.

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