The Memoirs

I am going to assume you’ve all set foot in a library – a place of endless knowledge. I remember that when my arm was handcuffed to Ed’s, the library was my escape. It was a place where I was finally free from my parent’s screams when I refused to eat and where my parents wouldn’t watch me like a hawk. Though this all sounds fine and good, I didn’t mention the darker side of the reason why I found the library so appealing.

I didn’t mention that the sole reason I visited the library was so I could completely immerse myself in anorexic culture.

There at the library, I would hang out in one single aisle – the aisle that was laden with memoirs of women who were stricken with anorexia. Though these memoirs were meant to show people the frightening truth about eating disorders, they were literally like my bible. By reading these disturbing memoirs, I learned how to become a “better” anorexic. I soon became a master at  the art of hiding food during  dreaded family meals and also became the queen of silent purging.

Now as I look back at that scary time, I can’t help but wonder how many other girls are doing the same thing. I shutter to even think about it.

So please if you are struggling, stay away from memoirs and other books about eating disorders. They just make you sicker and eventually, they may just send you to your grave.


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