The tantalizing aroma of melting chocolate and nutty homemade peanut butter fills my small ranch-style house. I know that in just a few short minutes, my mom will remove this mouth-watering, thick chocolate mixture from the stove and pour it into a bowl of Rice Chex. Then she will grab her favorite wooden spoon and mix the concoction together until a thick layer of chocolate is on every single morsel of Rice Chex. This alone would be a treat that would cause anyone to enter a state of euphoria, but it get’s better. The final and most important step in the creation of this delectable confection is dowsing the Rice Chex in nearly a half a bag of powdered sugar. Then, once my mother finishes evenly mixing in the powdered sugar, the most scrumptious dessert in the world has been made – Muddy Buddies or also known as Puppy Chow.
The only sad part is that I am not allowed to taste the sweet and nutty flavor of the Muddy Buddies. No, it is not due to some serious food allergy that would result in me experiencing anaphylaxis shock. Nor is it some crazy anti-junk food law established by my authoritarian parents. It is because there is someone that I live with who endlessly cuts my self-esteem down to shreds if I even consider putting some dessert in my mouth. He constantly calls me fat, ugly, and worthless to the point where I can barely live with myself.
Who is this cruel and heartless individual?
His name is Ed and he is my eating disorder.
He is the reason why each bite of food is a struggle.
He is the reason why my parents have had to stuff me in hospitals.
He is the reason why I am writing this very post.
I want people to realize that eating disorders ARE NOT a choice and the people who have them would do anything in their power to free themselves from the disease’s deadly clutches.
Please if you know someone with an eating disorder, don’t judge them. They are sick and they need your support, not your judgement. Especially during this holiday season where it seems like there is food around ever corner.