As I am sure most of you have realized, eating disorders are not diseases that just devastate the bodies and minds of sufferers, they also completely ruin families. Parents sometimes must take leave off work in order to focus all their attention on caring for their anorexic or bulimic child. Siblings of ED sufferers end up feeling abandoned and forgotten as their mom and dad spend most of their waking hours on their ill child - shuttling them to various doctor's appointments, supervising their arduous and emotionally-draining mealtimes , and visiting them while they are in the hospital. When a family member has an eating disorder, everyone has no other choice but to make sacrifices and put their lives on hold.
You may notice the beginning of this post is rather similar to one that was published recently (I have since taken that post down). This is because the post you saw was actually an accidentally published draft. Here's the real thing 🙂 🙂 🙂 ! When I submitted my college applications, I was already mentally prepared to [...]
It's been awhile now hasn't it? The last time you heard from me was in August, a couple of weeks before I was officially dubbed a high school senior. Now the oceans of green summer grass that once stretched across my town have been suffocated by a thick blanket of damp, dead leaves and the heat [...]
It has been ages since my ED has had this much control over my life. Not only does this scare me, it also scares my family and Dr. K (my psychiatrist). Now whenever I step Dr. K’s scale, I lose weight and I can sense he is deeply concerned that am falling back into old habits. Somehow, I am always able to convince him otherwise, but I know that soon he will see through my lies and start to demand that I seek a higher level of care.
My mind was like a hamster running forever on its wheel to nowhere. I got down on my hands and knees and pleaded with my mind to stop running. I tried to tell it that it could rest , I really did. But of course, it didn’t listen or maybe it just didn’t care.
As I laid on my bed wrapped up in my flowery bedspread, my mind began to go over yesterday's events. The endless arguing, the hateful words, the damn reading on the doctor's scale, the visit with my psychiatrist . . . all of these recent experiences kept replaying in my mind's eye like an endless [...]
Nowadays I am beginning to wonder why I even exist. Why couldn't I just have died from my wretched eating disorder? Why didn't my heart just stop? Why didn't my kidney's fail? Why didn't every single internal organ in my body call it quits? Why God? Why? God if you are out there, can't you [...]